Angelo's Crack Box
by VengefulMoon
Summary: I never knew my buddy had THIS much crack. [crackfic] [flames not accepted] [Angelo is OOC and a perv] [Rated for some violence in the special chapter and a bit of it in chapter 2] Complete. Removed AN in special chapter.
1. Prologue

**Seran: This one's gonna get a _little_ crazy.**

**Kira: Why's that?**

**Seran: Angelo's on crack.**

**Kira: WHAAAAAAAT?**

**Angelo: Hic!**

**Seran: And beer.**

**Angelo: (drops onto Lacus, his face buried in her chest)**

**Lacus: Pervert!**

**Seran: I don't own anything but myself and Angelo. On with the show, now!

* * *

**

Angelo's Crack Box

Seran's POV

I walked over to Angelo's room, and when I opened the door, I saw him hiccupping with his hand hanging over the side of his bed.

_He must have had too much alcohol._ I thought.

Kira walked in and saw a mess on the floor.

"Careful. There are some piles of bottles of beer on the floor at the 12 o'clock position." He whispered.

"I know." I whispered back. When we got a closer look at the bed, we saw a pile of crack.

"That's a lot of crack. Does he like this stuff?" Kira asked.

"He's been eating this stuff for the past few years, now." I answered. Kira gaped.

Auel passed by and saw the mess in Angelo's room as well. So did Stellar, Sting, Athrun, Cagalli and Lacus.

I then got out of the room and told my buddies to meet me at my room at 3:00 pm as I ran off.

3 hours later, we got together and formed a plot to steal Angelo's crack.

To be continued…

* * *

**Seran: (puts on a pair of roller skates and dashes around the room)**

**Kira: (bitten at the arm) Yeowch!**

**Yzak: (laughs at Kira)**

**Lacus: (tries to get Angelo off her but fails) Get this pervert off of me!**

**Seran: I'll help. TSA, can you send me some tweezers on your review? Thanks in advance! Later!**


	2. The Attempts

**Seran: Don't threaten me again, TSA, or you're off my favorite authors list. I'm serious. **

**Kira: He doesn't like empty threats like that one, especially if he's sent a pile of monkeys/children.**

**Seran: Well, anyway, I still don't own anything but Angelo and myself. On with the show!**

**Shinn: Let's have you-know-what somewhere else. Seran might faint again.**

**Luna: I agree. (Walks away holding Shinn's hand)

* * *

**

Angelo's Crack Box

Attempt #1

"Okay, here's the deal, since Angelo's asleep, we'll try the usual: sneaking into the room quietly, taking the box of crack and throwing it out of the ship."

"Copy that."

I went first. When I got in, every step that I made would usually make a loud noise.

20 minutes of noise later…

I got to the bed. I tried getting the box but Angelo clutched it tightly in his arms. It's like he's got a secret in that box.

When I slipped and crashed into the bottles of beer, he woke up, smacked me and threw me out.

Attempt #2

"He's probably wide awake now, so we'll have to sneak in through the ventilation shaft."

"That's fine."

Kira went into the shaft for this one. He got into the room safely, but made some noise and got thrown out. He definitely has crack in that box.

Attempt #3

"He seems to be asleep, so we'll try what we did the first time."

This time, Lacus went in. However, she ended up getting kicked out the way I got kicked out; getting smacked and thrown.

Attempt #s 4-10 also failed.

"If you wanted it, why didn't you ask me?" Angelo told us.

"YOU IDIOT! WE WENT THROUGH ALL THAT TROUBLE TO GET THAT CRACK OFF YOUR HANDS AND THROW IT OUT OF THE SHIP!" We all yelled. Shortly after, we beat him up, took the box and threw it out of the ship.

"I'm gonna get you for that."

* * *

**Seran: Special chapter coming up!**

**Everyone: Yahoo!**

**Angelo: I'm getting my revenge! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-(punched in the face)**

**Seran: Shut up. Your revenge won't be fulfilled in the special chapter, ever.**

**Angelo: What the heck...  
**


	3. Special: Drunken Brawl

**Seran: Here it is! The special chapter!**

**Kira: Seran doesn't own us!**

**Lacus: He only owns himself and Angelo!**

**Angelo: I wish I were able to get my revenge…**

**Seran: Shut up, Angelo.**

**Flay: What Seran said.

* * *

**

Angelo's Crack Box Special

I walked into the room and found Lacus and Kira, drunk as heck.

_Well, this is just great. They got all crazy and drank every drop of alcohol._ I thought.

And Athrun just HAD to take this time to go by.

"What's with those two?" Athrun asked.

"They drank "it"." I told him.

"(gulp) Whenever Kira drinks "it" he thinks everything he sees is Rau Le Creuset." Athrun said.

"Then that means…"

**SMASH!**

I fell backwards with a sickening thud. Apparently, I was hit in the head by Kira's fist.

"DIE, LE CREUSET!"

"I'M SERAN, YOU DOPE!"

**SMASH!**

Kira fell backwards, cart-wheeled a few times and fell on the floor with a nasty thud.

"What-what happened?" Lacus stammered whilst getting off the floor and onto her feet.

"You two drank the alcohol." Athrun and I stated matter-of-factly.

"Why the heck do I have a headache? And why are you two here?" Kira asked.

"Kira, you drank alcohol with Miss Clyne, got drunk, and got all plum crazy. You nearly killed me when you punched my lights out." I told him.

"I…punched you in the face?"

"Yes, you did, you dope."

**SMASH!**

Kira fell sideways and onto the ground with a VERY nasty thud. And who did it? Miss Clyne did.

"Who knew Lacus was this violent when she was drunk…"

* * *

**Seran: And that's a wrap.**

**Kira: That's all for today!**

**Angelo: I WANT REVENGE-(gets a banana stuck in his mouth)**

**Seran: You're never getting it.**

**Everyone but Angelo: Later for now!**


End file.
